Bacaan Ketika Saya (atau Kamu) Gagal

Tulisan ini dibuat tujuan utamanya untuk mengingatkan diri saya pribadi & kalian yg mungkin pernah mengalami perasaan yang sama, yaitu pahitnya kegagalan. Ya benar, saat ini banyak kegagalan yang sedang saya rasakan. Tidak perlu diutarakan semuanya, tapi kegagalan yang paling mengombang-ambingkan pikiran saya adalah nilai dan hasil ujian saya yg sungguh tidak memuaskan di semester ini. Terlepas dari variable eksternal (dosen yang mengajar, kegiatan non-akademik, dll), entah mengapa saya merasa memang nasib saya sedang berada di bawah sekarang. Menjumpai kegagalan terhadap amanah dari orang tua dan masyarakat yaitu hasil dari ujian berkuliah di ITB ini. Meski Indeks Prestasi (IP) belum keluar, namun beberapa nilai sudah diumumkan dan saya sangat down terhadap nilai-nilai tersebut, terutama akan sangat berpengaruh di IPK saya nanti.

When we start to have life

Life is not such flat! Hidup layaknya kurva sinus yang beresonansi terhadap sumbu y positif dan negatif. Alkisah, suatu hari keledai milik seorang petani terjatuh ke dalam sumur. Sementara si petani sang pemiliknya memikirkan apa yang harus dilakukannya terhadap keledai tadi. Akhirnya dia memutuskan bahwa hewan itu sudah tua dan sumur itu juga perlu ditimbun karena berbahaya. Jadi tidak berguna menolong si keledai. Ia kemudian mengajak tetangganya untuk membantunya. Mereka membawa skop dan mulai menyekop tanah ke dalam sumur. Si keledai menyadari apa yang terjadi. Dia meronta-ronta namun ia kemudian jadi diam. Setelah beberapa skop tanah dituangkan ke dalam sumur, si petani melihat ke dalam sumur dan tercengang melihatnya. Walaupun punggung si keledai terus ditimpa dengan tanah dan kotoran. Si keledai melakukan sesuatu yang menakjubkan. Ia mengguncang-guncangkan badannya agar tanah yang menimpa punggungnya turun ke bawah. Lalu dia menaiki tanah tersebut. Si petani terus menuangkan tanah kotor itu ke atas punggung hewan itu namun si keledai juga terus menggoncang-goncangkan badannya. Dan kemudian melangkah naik akhirnya si keledai bisa meloncat dari sumur dan bisa melarikan diri. [1]

Kehidupan terus saja menuangkan tanah dan kotoran serta masalah kepada kita. Maka cara untuk keluar dari sumur kesedihan dan masalah itu adalah dengan menjadikan kesediahan dan masalah tersebut menjadi tangga untuk keluar masalah dan kesedihan itu sendiri, jangan pernah benamkan masalah dan kesedihan dalam otak dan hati kita, tapi leparkanlah keluar lalu rakitlah menjadi tangga bersama orang-orang yang pandai merakit. Nah dalam usaha merakit itu jangan pernah menyerah dan berputus asa karena sikap menyerah dan putus asa itu adalah jenis barang dagangan Iblis yang paling laku keras.

Putus asa merupakan hal yang mudah sekali didapatkan. Saya bisa saja segera mengambil tali dan menggantukan leher saya dilangit-langit tanpa pijakan di lantai. Saya juga bisa segera pergi ke gedung bertingkat dan langsung jatuh bebas dari lantai teratasnya. Mungkin terdengar sedikit berlebihan, tapi fakta menyatakan banyak sekali orang, terutama mahasiswa yang melakukan hal tersebut dikarenakan hal-hal seperti nilai, ditolak dan tidak sanggup melanjutkan perkuliahan. Tapi apakah hal tersebut menyelesaikan masalah?

Silvester stallone memasarkan film Rocky ditolak 1855 kali.

Walt Disney ditolak 302 kali ketika mengajukan proposal Disneyland.

Merry Curie sebelum menemukan elemen radium, penelitiannya gagal sebanyak 48 kali

Thomas Alfa Edison menciptakan bola lampu melakukan percobaan sampai 999 kali

Rasulullah ketika melanjutkan kehidupan Islam di dunia. Dengan berbagai cara , beliau ditolak di Thoif , dicemooh, dicaci maki. Bahkan diembargo kebutuhan konsumsinya bertahun-tahun dan Beliau tidak pernah menyerah.

Berkaca dari kehidupan mereka, tidak ada orang yang berhasil tanpa melewatkan kegagalan. Justru karena kegagalan, tokoh-tokoh besar tersebut bisa meningkatkan diri menjadi pribadi yang lebih tangguh dengan kapasitas diri yang semakin tinggi. (Mengingatkan diri) nilai-nilai bukanlah yang seharusnya mejadi tujuan utama kuliah. Bukan berarti tidak penting, namun jika sudah terlanjur mendapatkan hasil ujian yang buruk janganlah diam dalam genangan kegelisahan akan nilai tersebut. Sisihkanlah tanah-tanah kegagalan akan nilai tersebut dan manfaatkanlah untuk meningkatkan derajat diri, layaknya keledai di kisah sebelumnya yang hendak ditimbun oleh tuannya.

Ada satu kisah lagi yang sungguh menginspirasi terutama bagi kita-kita yang sedang berada di bawah payung kegagalan. Ada seorang laki-laki yang memiliki sejarah hidup yang luar biasa:

• 1831 – ia mengalami kebangkrutan dalam usahanya.
• 1832 – ia menderita kekalahan dalam pemilihan tingkat lokal.
• 1833 – ia kembali menderita kebangkrutan.
• 1835 – istrinya meninggal dunia.
• 1836 – ia menderita tekanan mental sedemikian rupa, hingga hampir saja masuk rumah sakit jiwa.
• 1837 – ia menderita kekalahan dalam suatu kontes pidato.
• 1840 – ia gagal dalam pemilihan anggota senat Amerika Serikat.
• 1842 – ia menderita kekalahan untuk duduk di dalam kongres Amerika Serikat.
• 1848 – ia kalah lagi di kongres Amerika Serikat.
• 1855 – ia gagal lagi di senat Amerika Serikat.
• 1856 – ia kalah dalam pemilihan untuk menduduki kursi wakil presiden Amerika Serikat.
• 1858 – ia kalah lagi di senat Amerika Serikat.
• 1860 – ia akhirnya menjadi presiden Amerika Serikat.

Siapakah dia? Namanya ialah Abraham Lincoln. Ialah laki-laki yang menjadi presiden Amerika Serikat ke-16 yang berhasil memimpin bangsanya keluar dari Perang Saudara Amerika. Ia juga mampu mempertahankan persatuan bangsa kala itu dan menghapuskan perbudakan yang ada di Amerika Serikat [3]. Mungkin jika orang lain yang mengalami demikian banyak kegagalan ia sudah mengangkat bendera putih untuk mundur secara teratur. Tetapi Abraham Lincoln maju terus, kata mundur sama sekali tidak ada dalam kamusnya. Akibatnya, setelah semua kegagalan ia dapati, ia kemudian mencapai suatu sukses yang luar biasa.

Keberhasilan merupakan akumulasi dari kegagalan sebelumnya. Namun definisi gagal disini harus diluruskan dan diperlukan persamaan persepsi. Kegagalan (menurut saya pribadi) adalah ketika kita sudah berikhtiar semaksimal mungkin namun hasil yang diperoleh tidak sesuai dengan apa yang diharapkan. Ada variable takdir dan keputusan dari Yang-Maha-Menentukan disini, yaitu Allah SWT. Berbeda jika kita melakukan sesuatu dengan minim ikhtiar dan jauh dari doa tapi berharap mendapatkan hasil yang maksimal, itu namanya kebodohan.

Allah SWT pun ketika Dia memberikan kegagalan dan cobaan kepada umatnya, pastinya sudah memiliki alasan yang jauh dari jangkauan pikiran manusia. Pasti ada berjuta hikmah dan pelajaran yang dapat dipetik dari kegagalan yang kita dapatkan tersebut. Betapa indah Allah SWT mengungkapkan dalam firmannya;

Karena sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan, sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan. Maka apabila kamu telah selesai (dari sesuatu urusan), kerjakanlah dengan sungguh-sungguh (urusan) yang lain dan hanya kepada Tuhanmulah hendaknya kamu berharap.” (Q.S. Al-Insyiroh 94: 5-8)

Belum ada dan dipastikan tidak akan ada manusia yang bisa menciptakan mesin waktu. Jika sudah selesai dalam urusan, terutama ketika hasilnya adalah kegagalan maka berlalulah untuk mengerjakan urusan lain di masa sekarang. Hadapilah yang sekarang bisa dihadapi, jangan hanya merenungi masa lalu dan terucap berkali-kali “Jika saja saya waktu itu mengerjakan ini…”, itu artinya kita hanya orang bodoh yang membiarkan diri kita tenggelam dalam penyesalan masa lalu. Biarkan masa lalu menjadi tangga untuk kita terus melangkah menuju cita-cita yang lebih tinggi. (Kembali mengingatkan diri) biarlah nilai-nilai yang sudah keluar menjadi angka yang tidak berarti lagi untuk diubah, tataplah ke depan untuk memperbaiki nilai-nilai mata kuliah yang masih dapat diubah. Sungguh-sungguhlah dalam ikhtiar dan doa serta jadikanlah kegagalan di masa lalu menjadi evaluasi agar tidak terulang untuk masa yang akan datang.

Satu kisah terakhir sebelum saya menutup tulisan ini, yaitu kisah seorang pemuda yang sungguh membuat saya untuk berusaha menjadi orang yang besar yang seimbang kehidupan dunia dan akhirat.  Yang membuat saya ingin terus meningkatkan kapasitas diri terhadap pengetahuan dan kedekatan dengan Sang Illahi. Yaitu, seorang pemuda yang sangat saleh yang ketika berusia 21 tahun berhasil memimpin islam menaklukan eropa. Namanya Muhammad Al Fatih.

Ketika memimpin, Muhammad Al Fatih  dikenal dengan sifatnya yang tenang, berani, sabar menanggung penderitaan, tegas dalam membuat keputusan dan mempunyai kemampuan mengawasi diri (self control) yang luar biasa. Kemampuanya dalam memimpin dan mengatur pemerintahan sangat menonjol. Namun satu hal yang paling menginspirasi saya, terutama dalam menghadapi meteor-meteor kegagalan yang sedang berjatuhan ini adalah mengenai frekuensi shalat malamnya (Qiyamul lail).

Suatu hari timbul soal ketika pasukan islam hendak melaksanakan shalat jum’at yang pertama kali di kota yang baru berhasil ditaklukannya, konstatinopel. “Siapakah yang layak menjadi imam shalat jum’at?” tak ada jawaban. Tak ada yang berani yang menawarkan diri ! lalu Muhammad Al Fatih tegak berdiri. Beliau meminta kepada seluruh rakyatnya untuk bangun berdiri. Kemudian beliau bertanya. “ Siapakah diantara kalian yang sejak remaja, sejak akhil baligh hingga hari ini pernah meninggalkan meninggalkan shalat wajib lima waktu, silakan duduk!!” Subhanalloh!!! Maha suci Allah! tak seorangpun pasukan islam yang duduk. Semua tegak berdiri. Apa artinya? Itu berarti, tentara islam pimpinan Muhammad Al Fatih sejak masa remaja mereka hingga hari ini, tak seorangpun yang meninggalkan shalat fardhu. Tak sekalipun mereka melalaikan shalat fardhu. Luar biasa!

Lalu Muhammad Al Fatih kembali bertanya: “ Siapa diantara kalian yang sejak baligh dahulu hingga hari ini pernah meninggalkan shalat sunah rowatib? kalau ada yang pernah meninggalkan shalat sunah sekali saja silakan duduk!!”. Sebagian lainya segera duduk. Artinya, pasukan islam sejak remaja mereka ada yang teguh hati, tidak pernah meninggalkan shalat sunah setelah maghrib, dua roka’at sebelum shubuh dan shalat rowatib lainnya. Namun ada yang pernah meninggalkanya. Betapa kualitas karakter dan keimanan mereka sebagai muslim sungguh bernilai tinggi, sungguh jujur, pasukan islam Al Fatih.

Dengan mengedarkan matanya ke seluruh rakyat dan pasukanya Muammad Al Fatih kembali berseru lalu bertanya: “ Siapa diantara kalian yang sejak masa akhil baligh sampai hari ini pernah meninggalkan shalat tahajud di kesunyian malam? Yang pernah meninggalkan atau kosong satu malam saja, silakan duduk!!” apa yang terjad? Terlukislah pemandangan yang menakjubkan sejarawan barat dan timur. Semua yang hadir dengan cepat duduk! ”Hanya ada seorang saja yang tetap tegak berdiri. Siapakah dia? dialah, Sultan Muhammad Al Fatih, sang penakluk benteng Byzantium Konstantinopel. Beliaulah yang pantas menjadi imam shalat jumat hari itu. Karena hanya Al Fatih seorang yang sejak remaja selalu mengisi butir-butir malam sunyinya dengan bersujud kepada Allah SWT, tak kosong semalampun. [4]

Qiyamul lail, shalat tahajud, inilah senjata utama Muhammad Al Fatih dalam mengarungi kehidupan di dunia yang fana ini. Inilah Pedang Malam, yang selalu diasahnya dengan tulus ikhlas dan khusuk, ditegakkan setiap malam. Dengan pedang malam ini timbul energi yang luar biasa dari pasukan Muhammad Al Fatih. Hal itu juga yang meyakinkan pola pikir saya bahwa orang-orang besar yang berpengaruh, memiliki sejarah hidup yang tidak selayaknya orang-orang pada biasanya. Beliau rela bangun disepertiga malamnya, mengurangi waktu istirahatnya guna berkhalwat dengan Sang Maha Pencipta.

Which one will you choose, surrender or keep moving forward ?

Ditengah (beberapa) nilai-nilai ujian yang kelam ini, memotivasi saya bahwa harapan itu masih ada. Masa depan dapat dirubah dengan melakukan yang terbaik untuk hari ini. Masih ada beberapa nilai yang tersisa yang masih bisa diubah hasil akhirnya. Masih ada keberhasilan dibalik hujaman tajam dari pedang kegagalan hari ini. Justru luka tersebutlah yang kelak membuat kita kuat untuk menghadapi hari-hari esok yang lebih baik. Allahualam.[]

Sumber:

[1] http://ramah.fh.unsri.ac.id/

[2] http://www.nomor1.com/

[3] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abraham_Lincoln

[4] http://menarainspirasi.blogspot.com/

A Fad Thought in the Exam Weeks

Let me write something which is related with the exam (since these weeks are the weeks of exam, Oh Wt..!). Well *exhaling*, it is just a fad hypothesis actually. I just want to link the Exam and the function in calculus method. Now, imagine the Cartesian coordinate system in your mind.

Cartesian Coordinate System

Hypothetically, the ‘sleep duration’ and ‘the study days’ for the people (especially students) who will face the exam, will have two kinds of math function in Cartesian coordinate. Let’s say the study days are the abscissa, the sleep duration is the ordinate and the variable ‘x=H’ is the day they will face the exam.

First f(x):

Someone who really prepares from the inception of his study in college or school, must have the constant linear with the gradient is equal to zero. That’s

f(x)= C

Which C refers the duration of his sleep. 5 hours for instance.

Second f(x)

The 2nd function is contrastive with the first one. Someone who uses “one night racing system” (kebut semalam :p).. will have the function

f(x)= (H/x),    H≠0

Let’s assume x=0 is the day that very far from the exam day. So for limit x approaching to zero, his sleep duration is ∞ (means He feels in comfort zone, and thinks that exam is still too long). Yet, in the nights before examination (x → H) the ordinate of his sleep duration will be 1 hour. Means he is possible to not to sleep at that time.

To more ensure that this 2nd function is correct, for x > H the sleep duration will approach to zero means he will refresh his mind (party or gaming or do something fun) till the morning since the exam is over. Am I right ? Lol.

Dear WordPress :D

Dear WordPress,

I truly in vacillation situation now, it hesitates me, that I’m happy or sad, even disappointed,  I don’t know at all. But what are you for be here WordPress. I really want to give utterance of my feelings to you, just wanna convince myself that I’m not broken now.  So WordPress, permit me, myself, phrases all of my feeling now to you, to comfort my heart and my mind.

First WordPress, you know, there was a very remarkable, mournful, and inscrutable moment happened tonight between me and a girl, very witty girl . But, I’m so sorry WordPress, I can’t tell you what is that. That was a very secretly unforgettable moment in my life, and I can’t share in here. Just let be mine and hers. However, let we forget about the moment. It will be better if we just talk about what I was feeling when the moment was happening and after.

At that night, I was really confused because the damn feeling that I was feeling in to her. I was not so sure:

Is this like other people said as LOVE ? –(:#$7*0@%$P<3)–

C’mon WordPress, don’t be so shock like that. I’m a male teenager, so it’s still normal if I feel l*ve. You know WordPress, I was deadly feel disturbed because this d*mn feeling to her. If I just let it flow without any movement, it would just torture myself by my own. I couldn’t concentrate when I started to study, I couldn’t do something normal cause she always obsessed inside of my mind. Really WordPress, if now I have DEATHNOTE, I will directly write her name in that book no doubt anymore. -,-!! I really want to kill her, (if I can) in order this d*mn feeling loses away from my mind. You know WordPress what I had already done that night to her. You really wanna know. Really?

Once again I really sorry WordPress, I can’t tell you what happened between me and her. I can’t tell you, what I have already done to make this d*mn feeling loses away and be very far away for my life. Like I said before let this moment be my reminiscence and unforgettable moment between I and her. Let be mine and hers.

But then WordPress, don’t worry because you aren’t satisfied with my story. Caused the second that I very want to share with you is:

Now I don’t feel the d*mn feeling like people said as LOVE anymore at all. I don’t LOVE her anymore like I did yesterday. It’s lost from my life NOW. Although I can’t forget her full, let the time will delete the rest.

I’m now just a SINGLE boy who still wants to find the meaning of life. And even, the one that very convinces me is, in ISLAM, my religion, there is no named “steady” or “pacaran” in its. So I’ll keep my faith as could as I can, I’ll be far away from that word.

Let God leads me to find my best pathway of life to reach happiness in this provisional world and hereafter

Now WordPress, what I have to do now is, reconstruct my mindset, what I am now, and what I will be tomorrow, without turn my face back to see past . I tell this to you WordPress without any conceited or other bad meaning but just solely to make myself relieved without any remorse at all. And I hope, I and other people who in seeking the best future, can understand the meaning of life is that. We can’t throw away the word “love” from “life”. But it just, how we control it in order that not plunged into misery or falling to deviate way.

I still can live without any girlfriend. I still can reach what I dream for my future. I can still do normal even better than if I have girlfriend. I can still think freshly without any annoyance feeling. And I can still BE PEOPLE without girlfriend. Since I still don’t know my destiny future, I don’t now when my destined hour is, I don’t know what I will be tomorrow. The only one that I can do is STRUGGLE and PRAY, ask to GOD to give me the best way in the world and hereafter. Because WordPress, if you wanna know:

The only one who can changes your life, is yourself.

The only one who can chooses what do you gonna be, is yourself

The only one who can decides how will your life next, is yourself

NO OTHER.

At the end WordPress, I very relieved, I can tell to you what my feeling now. From now I can do my activities in my life more tranquilly. So I decide and carve in my deepest heart:

–NO LOVE ANYMORE, AT LEAST TILL I GOT MY DREAM UNIVERSITY– *

because:

—JUST I AM WHO CAN DECIDES HOW MY LIFE WILL BE—

*I erase this, caused I’m still confused and doubt with the word LOVE itself, huuh, God please shows me the best through my life

Happy Day with My Cousins

I and My Cousins

1st January ’10, the first day of this year, I spent my time to go to my grandma’s house. It was all because my uncle had a new child, and must be “marhaban” or cut a bit of the baby’s hair like usual done by other new child in Islam. Marhaban did in Saturday night, so I and herewith my big family were getting stuck to prepare many preparation for marhaban in friday. But in this post, I would just write my experiences when I spent my times with my cousins and not discussed about marhaban’s day. So in here I’ll show you when I and my very cute, kind, witty and great cousin spending time with chatting, watching together, and taking photos for reminiscence.

Beneath it all, I didn’t to remember the complete name of my cousins, since I was lazy to use left brain to memorize their name, but I prefer used right brain to memorize their face (ha ha criteria of lazy person). Since I have so many cousins in my big family, so in here I just tell some of them that I think they are interesting for me. So here we are, check it out:

1. Lili

This is my cutest cousins among us I thought. She is the youngest child of my aunt from 4 siblings. We usually call her “Yiyi”, I don’t know, maybe because her tongue couldn’t talked yet, so she always call herself with nickname Yiyi. It’s little awkward. But, you know, it’s really willy freaky hard to take her photo, moreover with me. She always move, or cry if I try to take photo of her. Crying is a mainstay weapon of her if someone wanna try to disturb her. But because of my talent as a professional photographer (ha ha ), I could take her photo, and even I could ask her styled, when I take my camera front of her. You want to know more, how does her face look like? or How cute she is? or how handsome I am? (:P) Well Let’s watch it out:

2. Ing-ga

His name is Lingga bla bla bla.. (as I told before I don’t know my cousin’s complete name). He is elder brother of Lili. And I think, he is really different with his sister, Because you know He is the naughtiest person among my cousins *I thought. He always disturb and arrogate whatever we’re doing and whatever we’re having. So no wonder, if many of my other cousins are crying because of his done. But sometimes I realize that he is not too as naughty as I thought, because he ever lend me his comic, share his game in computer and many again that make us like intimate. And because of that, I often take many photos with him. There we are:

3. Fadil

He has white skin and little chubby. Because of that, it makes him very farcical and amusing for me. He is still enough, and don’t like too much talking, but if we’re talking about Naruto or games relations with Naruto, he always prattle hard stopping. Yup, he is fond of Naruto and other anime like One Piece, doraemon and etc let in comic, film, animation and games. I also took some photos with him, here they are (the red cloth one):

4. Noval

He is still small, couldn’t walk and talk yet, but He is very cute moreover when he is smiling or laughing. Hm, I very want to pinch his cheek when he is smiling with all of my fingers. But the problem from him is he often crying, whenever there is no his parents beside him. So it’s really hard going alongside him without my uncle (his parent) beside us. But I don’t know why, one of solution to make him motionless, with way bring him to go on by car. So although there is no his parent beside him, if we just take him inside car he will quiet without any movement show us he want to cry. Because of that, when we go by car with Noval, it’s the only chance for me to take his photo. And finally I won out take his photos.

5. Della

Her nickname is Della, but I don’t know her complete name. She is still elementary high school and happy girl I think. She always smiling with shows her black and broken teeth inside of her mouth (ha ha). Because of that, she is always shamed whenever I take a camera front of her, and she is in smiling, along of it will show her black and holing teeth. But she is sweet and beautiful little girl, So I proud to take photo together with her (lol). There I and She:

6. Iman

The last cousin I’ll write about is Iman. He is still elementary school too. He is handsome enough I think. I like the style when he is talking, it’s cool . In my grandma’s house he always use microphone to talk and sing with my other cousin breezy. So it whoop it up. But I also accomplish get photos with him:

I think six above of my cousins enough represent among them. But in here I will give Bonus Pictures in this post. *ha ha it’s really not important. Yup but I think I have to show this. Even though the tittle of this post is happy day with my cousin. But I also want show you my private photos with no cousins at all (ha ha). Here we are. Enjoy it

Ordinary Boy Who Pursue Happiness

My name is Muhammad Afif Izzatullah.

It’s carved to me when I was delivered to this complicated world. That fabulous name is given by my beloved parents by the first time cause I’m the first child of them.

I have happy family who always there for me whatever the situation and condition I feel by. They are:

My Father                 Drs. H. Imam Mahfudh

My Mother                Hj. Rosanah, S.Ag.

1st Sister                 Sania Rifa Zaharadina

2nd Sister                Annisa Salsabilla

I’m just ordinary people who have an extraordinary ambition. My family is not too rich or poor, we are just standard family who pursue happiness in this world. As a first child I have responsibility at least to lead my two young sisters to walk in the true line. Although I occasionally clash with them but it is never mind as we still love each other and soon get well relationship again.

I’m usual clever enough person who always want to smile every day. I grew up and be Junior High School and Senior High School student. I very thank to God because the environment in my home and school changes me become a good person. Now I’m more mature and can think more rationally. I am an independent person who like motivate myself to establish my path way to be a good person. I mostly manage my own business by myself as I can do it, because I don’t want burden my parent and be a good son. Since I ever lived in dormitory and traveled alone I’ve learned to socialize and being independent enough to take care of myself.

If with my friends, I also have both bad and good personality. My friends describe me that I’m disturbing people, critic and etc. But they also think that I’m a funny person, could be ask for cooperate (in discussion), kind, creative, clever enough, and so on. But I’ll struggle certainly to close bad attitude door and open as wide as the good attitude door in my life. Because I’m conscious that I’m just a usual human that couldn’t be a perfect one.

Most people said I look like my mother let in physic and behavior. I am so close with my mother and father because our family is a democracy family that everybody could say every problem and sharing with each other. In my home, I sometimes help to do daily assignment, but just in small part. For example: tidying and cleaning my room, washing my motorcycle, cleaning the bathroom, ironing my cloths, and washing my dish after eating. But all of those things rarely I do if I have some busy assignment from my school.

I’m so grateful have a kind parent who always takes after me and cares about me. Without them I’m zero, but because them too I can be a hero. When I have some troubles in my school they always beside me. With their precious words I always get many advices that very help me to do something about my future. So what I have to do now, requite all of their merits that have been given to me with be an independent person and be a success person who make happy my parent without burden them anymore.

Along my entire life, I interested with many things actually. It could be divided into 3 parts: sports, education and entertainment. In sports; playing badminton, basketball, soccer and swimming are the top one that I most interested in. If education; I very like with math, drawing, science and researching. Therefore I join extracurricular with named KIR, that’s a researcher club. I also like music, playing guitar, reading, writing, and internet in my entertainment part.

As I have too many interests, so I more spend my times in my school and my other club. In my school I join KIR extracurricular (a Researcher Club) like I said before because I very like with writing. We are all people who like researching gather in this club and we usually join competition from city till national grade. Beside that KIR also trains our skill to make scientific paper for college later. Until now I’ve written more than 10 scientific paper. These all are result of my struggling and sweats in my beloved KIR club.

For sport I join basketball club since I’m tall enough than my others friends. I also ever had joined PUSRI swimming and badminton club when I was Junior High School. I join so many sport clubs like this because I want to keep my body fit and healthy when I stuck with my routines.

For art, I join 2 D (Two Dimension) club which has activities drawing, painting and coloring. We do this activity every Saturday in my school. Beside that I’m also one of member school’s choirs in my Junior High School and Senior High School. I also have a band with 5 members, I’m as a guitarist together with my four other friends. Nevertheless, I’m sure that these all activities are very useful for me to develop my right brain of art.

I also active enough in other organization like ‘Boy Scout’ in my elementary school, School’s Student Organization in junior high school, GEDS (Global English Debate Society) in my English course, ACMY (Al-Qobah creative Moslem Youth) near with my home, and other little organizations. Because, being involved in community activities like this, make me learn and find big valuable things for myself and my future. About the time, honestly I pursue all of them in my times, because I very want to get many experiences as long as I still young and have many chances to do it. Because pursue this very useful things make me move forward when I construct my future foundation.

In my community activities I have some different roles. First in my class I ever have been a class leader because our class leader always changes every week. Despite of just one week but I could learn leadership even though in a small part. I also ever had been a vise-captain in school’s student organization when I was Junior High School. It was so difficult to share my time but I could handle it with my effort and got many experiences about lead many people at that time. In soccer I usually play as a ‘midfielder’, ‘shooting guard’ for basketball and ‘single player’ in badminton. But my skill is just usual if it compares with my other great friends. If in GEDS (Debate Club) I usually be a first or second speaker, it’s so help me to talk before public. And I also ever had been a researching captain. So I have full responsibility about my researching result. All of these experiences are very important for me to step and move forward in my future pathway.

My extraordinary ambition now is Go Abroad. I have some objective why I very want to do this.

I want to study about everything in other countries and get many information also education from there.

I very want to school in other country especially countries which have developed technology. Because stay long time and get educations at there, can give me an inspiration about how my future is established.

I very want to meet many friends from other countries, study about their culture, history, learn about the situation in their city and get a big experience that I very dream before.

I realized the world is not too narrow like usual people think about. So I want to open my eyes that so many place and activity I have to feel out.

I want to travel, get some fun journey in big country out there.

If I success do it, I will use all of those experiences to build my best future both for myself and my country. And make Indonesia can have good relation with other countries. All of those are my personal goals to go abroad. But I emphasize the main goal of me is to find and look for fabulous experience that I haven’t done it before and make proud my parent.

The biggest problem for me along my entire life is quarrel with my friends. I agree with proverb: 1000 friends are too less but 1 enemy is too much. If I have even though just 1 enemy, my heart can’t be comfort. Cause I always think how to recover my friendship. But I’ll force myself and throw away the prestige feeling one in my heart to apologized with my quarrel’s friend and throw the enmity one to make comfort my heart again. And the second situation that I feel difficult to solve it is when I got bad score in school’s lesson. But if I just regret and do nothing it can’t change anything. The things I have to do are just study hard again, find my minuses, praying and fix my bad score.

When I step in my path life, I got so many hindrances and obstacles definitely. The obstacle that I often feel it is when I try to stand up again from one failure. For example when I failed in one research competition, I felt despondently at that time. Because I had done full effort and spent much times to do it, but the result was so disappoint me. I thought that I wouldn’t do again any research because it was just wasting my energy and times. But I realized that one failure was a key to be successful. So many scientist in past had many failure but they were success because of it. Thomas Alpha Edison needed much failure to discover many useful things like a lamp. So I thought that I have to follow their path and studied more about researching. I began to learn about scientific writing again in internet, books, and ask with everybody who has many experienced about this. And finally I got that result. I success to stand in the first place in one scientific paper competition. That was a very awesome and fabulous achievement for me. Because, not only my name but it also bring credit to my school and my family.

Those all above is a little describing of me and my life. But like everyone else, I’m still an ordinary boy who be nothing without any people helping. So in this provisional world I just carve in my deepest Heart:

“I’m Just an Ordinary Boy Who Pursue the Happiness like Everyone Else”

Best Quotation  : “Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve”

Best Motto          : Take a chance because you never know how perfect something can turn out to be

Know more about me:

Facebook : http://www.facebook.com/afif.izzatullah

Twitter : http://twitter.com/Afifizzatullah

Other Blog : http://www.cakarafif.blogspot.com